Magically Doomy!
by Achi-chan
Summary: A HPInvader ZIM crossover. Zim's robot bee is on the loose...co-authored with ScumSkunk
1. doomdoom

A/N 1: With the help of my buddy Skumskunk this story is born! MWAHAHA! ....Yeah, anyway, to those who read my story, ZIM!, this is NOT a sequel, just something our deranged minds came up with. We do not own either Zim or Harry Potter, because if we did we'd be living in a really big castle, and we don't.  
  
A shrill scream rang through the air. Large buildings exploded and debris rained down on the terrorized citizens. Trees burned and windows shattered. People ran everywhere and anywhere, trying to get away from the terrible monster. By the time it had gotten to the center of the town, it was deserted, so it flew on. It's expressionless gaze observing all.  
  
When news got out about the terrible monster, special exterminators flooded to Europe from all over the world, but none could exterminate the terrible monstrosity. Some got terrible diseases, some died, and others even got really bad cases of dandruf. No one could defeat the EVIL monster. It was just too powerful! Then, on day after hours of death and special medicated hair treatments, the monster simply disappeared....from the muggle world anyway.  
  
Far, far away over in America,[eww, you mean that place where Wacko Jacko lives?] (Yes, where Jacko lives, now quit interrupting me!)[Yes, ma'am] Anyway in America, Zim was conducting another emergency experiment.  
  
"Yes,YES!" he yelled, flailing his arms at a blueberry muffin with several tubes connected to large machines, sending fluid in and out of the muffin. "I will soon know the secrets of the laser canons located in this filthy.... SECRET THING, YES!" He started to laugh insanely as he pictured all the ways Dib would beg for mercy, but would become a big pile of brown mush anyway, yay!  
  
Two hours later, when Zim finally stopped laughing (oh, wait we still have five seconds left)  
  
. . . . .  
  
(okay)  
  
The muffin-slash-Earthnoid battle weapon of doomy doomness was gone!GASP!  
  
"The battle Earthnoid doomy weapon doomy...doom... is gone! AHHHH! DOOM!"  
  
Zim ran around his underground base, screaming and basically looking like an idiot.  
  
G.I.R on the otherhand, was watching the fuzzy channel, unaware of Zim's frantic.... franticness. But soon his favorite, well second- NO! his sixth favorite show was interrupted by a rude crying thing, screaming of an apocalyptic explody end. Zim, stopped circling upon hearing the filthy human's wretches of scary death.  
  
"We're all going to die horrible deaths filled with death and pie! Die, die, DIE!"  
  
The human worm started to claw violently at his head, then- poof! His head- exploded pieces of flesh, skull and gray matter splattered all over the room and camera lens. Cleany people wiped off the camera and another reporter was brought in. Intrigued, Zim watched on.  
  
The new reported had a thin, gaunt face and a strechy smile. She also had a piece of cabbage stuck in her teeth (the cabbage had a dashing smile, rawr!).  
  
"A mechanical menace has been sited in Scotland, terrorizing towns and cities by the minute. This evil creature most likely will be the end of our modern civilization, leaving our world to be ruled by a potato of such evil and chaos that each and every one of us will be hunted down. Next up, a new chocolate chip cookie guarantied to give you twice the fat calories!"  
  
As the porter disappeared from the screen, a picture of Zim's robot bee and another picture of a really green cookie appeared. Then, the fuzzy channel resumed, G.I.R clapped and Zim realized exactly what was going on.  
  
"My robot bee has stolen my Earthnoid battle weapon of DOOM"  
  
A/N2: Poor, poor Harry....BYE! 


	2. DEATH!

A/N1: And Harry and Co. enter! We don't own HP or Invader ZIM Cherry Lips, Garbage, Complicated or Avril Lavinge. And if we did we would have several stalkers, and we don't, but if anyone is interested in a seven-days- a-week stalking position for either SkumSkunk or Achi-can you can call the following number to get a schedule: 1-800-I-will-stalk-U. Have you references ready!  
  
It was a fine day at Hogwarts, the sun was shinning[yay!], the grass was green[yay], and the giant squid had just left to get lypo-suction![..uh..]  
  
Harry, Ron, Hermione had been peacefully eating their breakfast, when suddenly..THOUSANDS OF DEATH BEARING OWLS CAME SWOOPING THROUGH THE WINDOWS, TARGETING THIER YOUNG OWNERS, BEARING SHARP TALONS.DELERIOUS FEAR BROKE OUT AS CHILDREN WERE SHOT DOWN BY OWLS OF ALL SIZES, HURLING THEMSELVES AT-(wait, wait, that's book seven isn't it? Whoops, sorry people, anywho..) Thousands of owls suddenly not-swooped down to their owners, delivering kindness from thier family.[I like the other version better](shut up)  
  
"Hermione, "Harry said, eyeing her mail suspiciously, "let me see your mail, your parents probably sent evil dentures to bite me to death in it!"  
  
"I doubt that my parents would send you a vast dark evil by mail, and in my mail especially, honestly!"  
  
"You never know Hermione," Harry whispered, his eyes bugging," This morning I couldn't get my hair to comb down!"  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes, "Harry, your hairs always messy!"  
  
Harry's eyes got big "You mean he's been cursing my hair since I was a baby!?" Harry sat back to come to grips. "I always knew he was out to make me unpopular.."  
  
"Me too," Ron nodded, "He did the Manyus Pimpleus on me, now I have pimples, zits and a wart!"  
  
"No, Ron," Harry and Hermione said together," That's just puberty!"  
  
"Are you sure?" Ron queried, scratching one of the bulbous blemishes on his face, causing it to spout pus and drench all the Gryfindors on his right.  
  
After the three friends finished their breakfast, which was now covered with a delicious pus sauce(high in protein!), they walked into the hall, happy to start the day.  
  
As they walked, Ron started to skip and sing to the tune of Avril Lavinge's "Complicated":  
  
"I have, so much ac-a-ne, that it's, gonna affect my da-at-ing, and if I'd only let them be, they'd heal, you'd see!"  
  
Hermione pranced in front, "This isn't a musical, Ron!"  
  
Harry pushed her back, singing to the tune of Garbage's "Cherry Lips"  
  
"Voldemort's out to get meeeeee, He's old and dumb, just turned 61, he made my hair messy, so when I never got it combed, he was nowhere to be found, his farts turn people baaad! He was the ugliest thing I had ever seen!"  
  
Then the two boys started to do a complicated dance consisted of moves from the Hokey Pokey, The Electric Slide, and The Funky Chicken.  
  
"Potter!"  
  
Harry and Ron stopped dancing long enough to see Draco and his buddies coming towards them, then resumed dancing.  
  
He stood in front of the two dancing boys, jerking his index finger.  
  
"Potter," he screeched, spit flying from his mouth, "I decisively dislike your internal organs!"  
  
The minute the spit landed on Harry's upper lip, he put his left foot back in, and waved his wand about. Then a red glow surrounded him, and he became Super saiyan Harry! Then Draco also waved his wand and a green glow surrounded him, Super Saiyan Draco!  
  
First Harry kicked Draco hard in the left shin, then Draco kicked him in the right nostril. Ignoring his bloody nose, Harry kicked him in the second to the left monkey, then the monkey, hurt and betrayed, ran away.  
  
Harry, sensing this development would turn the tide against him, cast a spell on Ron to stop him from whimpering about his blemishes, and turn him into Super Ron, able to swim in water for great distances, jump over tall fences, and scare little children on Halloween.  
  
Ron jumped over Draco and kicked him in the head, Draco tried use the Avada Kedevra on Harry missed killing Hermione instead.  
  
Ignoring the smoking body, they continued fighting, unfortunately for Draco, when he hit Ron In the face, one of his Super Pimples (which were now filled with Super Pus) exploded and got in his eye, burning them out of their sockets. Celebrating, Harry and Ron began to breakdance.  
  
Their first class was potions.  
  
Though Hermione and Draco's seats were empty, the class was still very lively. Once again Nevelle's potion was disastrous. His cauldron had blown up making a large gray portal in the corner of the dungeon. The Portal sucked up several 5th years then started to turn bright colors. Then a lone object emerged. Some genius shouted out, "Golly, gee, it's a funkah bee."

A/N2: Please leave a review and wipe your feet on the way out, we like our dirt thank you.


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